By Michael The (Idunno) trees by the deck were flowering last week in an explosion of fluff that startled and enlivened as I stood in the kitchen, yelling “faster, faster” at the caffeine machine. This week, the blossoms are gone. The leaves will be a dull green until just before November, when they’ll change to…
Category Archives: Michael
Where the Boys Are
By Michael Last week, I attended a bris, the 3,500+ year-old rite of circumcision that connects every newborn Jewish male to hundreds of generations that preceded him. It’s a bit unnatural to see a friend’s kitchen transformed into an operating room, but there’s also great comfort in considering the unbroken line of families that have…
The Road to Ruin Has Great Coverage
By Michael There’s this ad on television that’s driving me crazy right now. A mom and her daughter are at the mall. Okay, I only have one X, so I never quite get it when a mother and daughter in some ad are at the mall, smiling and giggling like they’re just about to collect…
Who’s a cutie wootie smootiekins? You Are.
By Michael So this old lady with a face like a road map is heading out of the restaurant when she spots the baby. Not her baby, of course, or even her grandchild. Some stranger’s baby, as best I can tell. But that doesn’t matter. She can’t resist. Suddenly, she’s leaning over the table and…
Not in Our Family, We Don’t!!
By Michael Don’t you wish there were secret words you could use to get your children to wake up and smell the coffee, or at least notice the crayons that need to be picked up off the carpet? Wish no more, for I am about to impart to you a sentence that changed my girls’…
Real Men Use Plungers
By Michael Today, I took Jill to Home Depot to get stuff I needed for a few projects I’ve been meaning to get to, fulfilling my manly duties and showing her my version of the Nordstrom Sale. (Except, of course, that my purchases are much more practical and essential to our existence, unlike shoes and…
Why is She the Favorite?
By Michael We have a simple rule in our family: No jealousy. Period. End of Discussion. No, not the end of the discussion, because there isn’t even going to be a discussion. No jealousy. We won’t treat you identically, but we’ll treat you equally. It will be the same, only different, because you are different…
If Only I Could Go Back in Time…
By Michael I had some time on my hands last week, so I stopped in at the library, pulled a book off the shelf and read it. The book was written by a man with regrets, who wished his life had been different as he was growing up. He made arrangements to go back to…
Money Matters
By Michael During the Depression, as my dad explained it, your uncle or grandfather might reach into his pocket, pull out a few coins and tell you to take one. If there was a quarter and a penny in his outstretched palm, dad said, you took the penny. If you took the quarter, you might…
Faded Memories
By Michael The girls get veto power over the memories I share on this blog, because I have the opportunity to embarrass them more than I bring shame upon myself. It’s only fair and, truth be told, they probably have some embarrassing secrets to share about me. Of course, I don’t know what those secrets…