A Dose of Humor – The Great and Terrible Mr. Wii Fit

5 Minutes for Parenting’s weekly column, A Dose of Humor, is here to remind you to take your humor pill regularly as the best medicine to treat the side effects of parenting! It features a different blogger every week and is hosted by Rachel at Grasping for Objectivity in My Subjective Life. Now you can also join in by linking in your funniest moment of the week, using the Mr. Linky at the bottom of this post!!

When not hanging out with the characters of her novel-in-progress, Heidi Ashworth is busy with important stuff like blogging and promoting her book, Miss Delacourt Speaks Her Mind, a Jane Austen-era romantic comedy. She tries to squeeze laundry, cleaning, grocery shopping and caring for her home, garden, husband, and three children, including a multiply disabled son, in between sessions at the keyboard but is failing miserably. Meanwhile, her floors are crunchy, her kids have the munchies and her husband is getting punchy. Read all about it at Dunhaven Place.

Machines have taken over my life. First there was Jeeves, the alarm clock, waking me up every morning with his admonitions and commands (Go buy shoes! Let me do your hair! Use this incredibly expensive and effective face cream! Whine whine whine . . .)

Now there is Mr. Wii Fit who is every bit as clever and “knowing” as Jeeves (though not nearly as charming since he doesn’t speak with an English accent). The very astute Mr. Wii reminded us multiple times of the Middle Child’s birthday last week, very politely asks us if we have had breakfast yet if we try to use him too early in the morning and routinely offers to give us exercise and weight loss tips. (In short, he is a bit of a nag.)

This morning when I stepped onto the fitness board (after it said, “Oh!” as if the brunt of my weight was just too much for it to bear or perhaps merely surprised that I still weigh pretty much what I did when I started this whole adventure a mere three weeks ago) Mr. Wii printed this message on the screen: “So how do you think Daddy is doing this morning?

Oh, how you make me laugh, Mr. Wii! You are such a knowing one! (It had been a couple of days since “Daddy” had availed himself of all Mr. Wii has to offer.) I thought perhaps Mr. Wii was attempting to recruit me to nag Daddy to get with the program. I chuckled about this since I had just viewed the chart that shows the weight loss/gain (there are some of us here that actually need to gain weight—they are just the biggest losers, don’t you think?) of all five of us here at Dunhaven Place and I felt pretty sure Daddy’s weight had been going in the wrong direction.

Then Mr. Wii flashed multiple answers to his question across the screen. My choices were A. doing worse B. doing better or C. the same. Whoa! Mr. Wii expected me to commit to an answer. On his screen. The one attached to some kind of memory chip. Suddenly I was no longer laughing.

I don’t know why I felt I had to lie to Mr.Wii. I think I must have had some kind of Hallish paranoia thing going on (what if I chose “doing worse” and Mr. Wii told Daddy, a circumstance that seemed imminently possible) so I chose “the same”.

That’s when Mr. Wii threw me the facer. “Oh!” he wrote, “maybe you just aren’t paying enough attention to Daddy!”

Mr. Wii knew I had lied. He knew it! Oh no! Mr. Wii was becoming sentient! Hadn’t I seen this happen over and over and over again in Star Trek, The Next Generation (and endless other TV shows as well)? It was only a matter of time before Mr. Wii snaked some kind of cable to my computer and contacted Daddy with my perfidy. I had to hurry—there was no time to lose! I sprinted to the computer to email The Spouse and confess all just as fast as my Wii Fitted legs could carry me.

This post was originally published on January 16, 2009 at Dunhaven Place.

If you would like to be considered to be featured in A Dose of Humor, email Rachel at doseofhumor (at) gmail (dot) com.
Join us and link up your funniest moment of the week here!!!

6 Responses to A Dose of Humor – The Great and Terrible Mr. Wii Fit
  1. Stephanie
    May 8, 2009 | 7:28 am

    I still really want one of those wiis!


  2. corrin
    May 8, 2009 | 7:37 am

    Worse than “Oh!” is hearing “you’re obese!” is that squeaky, perky little Wii voice. Yet, I still love my Wii.

  3. Lisa
    May 8, 2009 | 10:14 am

    Oh my goodness I know what you mean about the “Oh!” when you step on, like it’s a surprise how much you weigh or something LOL!

  4. Melissa
    May 8, 2009 | 3:01 pm

    I think I’ll be able to live without this particular machine helper… 🙂

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