Tooth Fairy

By Megan


So, we have a loose tooth in the household. It’s our first, and I discovered it a little over a week ago upon taking a closer look at a tooth that appeared to be getting crookeder and crookeder by the day. Turns out there was good reason for all the crookedness – that tooth is hanging in there by a thread. It’s an important milestone – one I romantically looked forward to celebrating with her since the day that tiny tooth first made its appearance, when Bean was about 7 months old.

Still it took me by surprise. It’d occurred to me occasionally over the course of the past two years, as kids close to Bean’s age lost teeth, that this day would come, and I should probably start dreaming up how I wanted to approach the whole Tooth Fairy thing with our children, but as soon as that little gap in someone else’s child’s smile was out of my eyesight, I’d forget all about it. Now I suppose it’s undeniably time for me to get on the Tooth Fairy ball.

Somewhat complicating the matter is the fact that my daughter has actually met the Tooth Fairy. She’s visited Bean’s preschool class two years running, and she is QUITE A WOMAN. She wears a big, poofy pink tulle dress with a matching satin bow the size of Texas above her behind, carries a sparkly magic wand with trailing iridescent plastic ribbons and drives a green Ford Expedition with leather interior. We accidentally ran into her as she was hitching up that pink poofy skirt and hoisting herself up behind the wheel in the pre-school parking lot. She drinks Diet Dr. Pepper and smokes, wears black wedge-heeled flip-flops and could use a pedicure.

Frankly, I’m kinda stymied about what to do with that particular persona, now that it’s been assigned to the Tooth Fairy for Bean by default. I didn’t have a firm idea yet of who she’d be around here, but I liked the idea of “designing her” myself, and I’m pretty sure I wouldn’t have arrived at this particular iteration on my own. I may have come up with someone a little frilly, a tad sparkly, but offset the pinkness and the iridescence with some metal and hi-tech gadgetry so that she’d be exciting and relatable for Peabody when his turn rolled around. Like maybe she’d wear a poofy dress, but she’d drive around in a black Porsche 911 and carry a cool light saber instead of Disney Princess wand.

Bean seems to have no interest at all in actually LOSING her loose tooth. I can’t decide if I should intervene and show her what to do or just let her figure it out on her own. Seems like I never had to be told – I just instinctively pulled, pushed, twisted and wiggled without letting up until each of my teeth was out. I guess I won’t worry about it, because at least her disinterest buys me some time to come up with a household Tooth Fairy plan.

First step, procure an empty DP can and a few cigarette butts to leave on the front porch.

This is SO not turning out to be what I thought it’d be.

Megan also blogs at FriedOkra.

10 Responses to Tooth Fairy
  1. Jenn
    May 17, 2010 | 10:34 am

    Eww! I would be SO disappointed if I hadn’t been able to “invent” the tooth fairy on my own around here! I mean, having Santa visit is one thing – he’s pretty standard – but the tooth fairy? Ugh.

    You could always tell Bean what I tell my kids about the ‘fake’ Easter Bunnies and Santas that we see at Wal-Mart and the malls… that they are just helpers hired by the REAL one because the true Santa/Easter Bunny/whatever is too busy to be making appearances. Then you can reinvent the Tooth Fairy and old way you want to. xoxo

  2. Jenn
    May 17, 2010 | 10:35 am

    Oh! Two more things…
    1) How in the world did she get old enough to have a wobbly tooth?
    2) That photo is gorgeous!

  3. Jen
    May 17, 2010 | 11:46 am

    My oldest hasn’t lost teeth yet, but all of his friends/neighbors have so I know it’s just a matter of time. I’m excited about it, but need to get ready. I want to make a little “tooth pillow” to put the tooth in so he can put it under his pillow and so that the tooth fairy can put some change/ maybe some sugar free gum in it too. They really do grow up SO FAST huh!

  4. Melanie
    May 17, 2010 | 4:17 pm

    OH my goodness! That is so funny because I just posted about my son losing his first tooth on my blog! I loved this post!!!

    ~ ~

  5. Kelly
    May 17, 2010 | 10:47 pm

    Oh my stinkin’ word. I can’t shake the mental image of the tooth fairy dragging on a cigarette and needing a pedicure.

    My only advice about the Tooth Fairy is: Don’t make her too wealthy! We were so proud when N lost her first tooth, my husband wanted to leave her $1. But I had just read a great comment thread in the blogosphere about how much money the Tooth Fairy has to shell out over her lifetime (especially if you have more than one child). That first tooth sets the tone for every tooth to come. Pay wisely.

  6. stampedwithgrace
    May 18, 2010 | 9:54 am

    my 6 yo lost her first tooth recently! so fun 🙂 our first child was given $1 or a small toy for each tooth lost, but now that child #6 is losing teeth, some how we have gotten to where we don’t give anything. she just gets the pure joy of losing a tooth, and lots of pictures taken, of course. A friend of mine with 3 kids goes out and gets a tub of ice cream for the family to enjoy for a lost tooth. I also keep a baggie of all their teeth, with the first one taped to the side and a note telling which tooth and the date.

  7. edj
    May 19, 2010 | 4:18 am

    I LOVE this post! That photo is gorgeous–ok ok it’s your daughter who’s gorgeous of course. Those eyes! And if you leave a diet DP and cigarette butts on the porch, I will love you forever.
    We have not been super successful Tooth Fairy people, although of course it’s easier at the beginning. Actually our first lost tooth was swallowed. I said, Ok then, but my husband actually looked for it. I have blocked from my memory if he ever found it or not. But back then, we would remember to slip the money under the pillow. 3 years later when we were living in France, the “little mouse” was having to write notes in poor French about how she’d forgotten her purse and would be back the following night. Yeah. So good luck!
    Now, of course, we just hand over the cash.
    My second son loses teeth like your daughter–they are loose for MONTHS and hang by a thread.
    Also our Tooth Fairy/Little Mouse was fairly cheap. I second the advice to start slow.

  8. Joy
    April 12, 2011 | 5:58 pm

    That image you described of the tooth fairy was just hilarious!

    My son will be approaching this age soon. I wasn’t squeamish when it came to pushing my teeth out as a kid but I am not sure how I am going to feel about him having a lose tooth dangling in his mouth….gross!

    I know I’m a little late to this post, but this Mom’s Guide had a helpful article on caring for teeth that are falling out.

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