The Glue That Binds

By DeeDee

I put on my reading glasses to see the tear in the tiny Polly Pocket dress that my daughter just brought me to repair. Daily, my children lay beloved toys before me, hoping above all hopes that I can make them whole again. I’m pretty handy with a tube of glue. I can tackle anything from the intricate reattachment of limbs to Barbies (dismembered by a little brother who shall remain nameless) to the permanent afixment of a Mermaid’s boobie caps, so they don’t come off in the bath. “Boobie caps” is a term coined by my 5 year old to describe a “bra.”

My children look to me to make everything okay. I kiss away booboos, dispel nightmares, and can kill almost any offending bug with one fell swoop. “Kill” may be too strong a word. I “stun” the insect just enough so that it can be flushed without the splattering of bug guts.

Yesterday, I discovered that there is one thing that I can’t fix. My daughter’s first broken heart. My 7 year old recently met a new friend, also 7, who lives down the street. My girls are avid bike riders now, so we venture to the cul de sac, where the girls can tear around and around, without the worry of traffic. “Sheila” has been joining the girls, and they’ve had a wonderful time together, riding bikes and playing hop scotch.

The girls discussed getting together for bike riding, and yesterday, at the appointed time, the new friend came to our door to get Emme (who had been talking about it all day, ad nauseum). Cailey and I tag along as groupies. We all set off to the cul de sac on our bikes. Did I just say “our”? I meant “their” as there is not enough insurance in the state to get me on a bike.

After about 5 minutes of fun and frivolity, Sheila noticed a little friend of hers down the street had just come home and she was going to ride down really quick just to say hi. She came back after a few minutes and was talking to Emme. I knew from my daughter’s face what was happening. I moved closer to hear. It seems that the other friend had invited Sheila over to play inside and she said yes. She apologized a few times, and rode off. The angry mama bear in me bristled. Emme maintained her grace as she quietly mumbled “That’s okay” after her erstwhile friend, and we headed home. When we were safely out of view, I saw tears begin to stream down my daughter’s face. By the time we got in the door, she was crying hysterically. She didn’t understand why her friend would just leave her like that.

I held her in my arms and gently rocked her while she cried. We talked about the incident at great length. A painful life lesson. One of the first of many I’m certain. We discussed how to treat other people, forgiveness, the love of Jesus, and how many cookies she should eat for a snack.

My heart was broken as well. I realized that sometimes I’m going to have to sit helplessly by, while my children get hurt. No amount of kissing, or adhesive, or Princess bandaids will help them. I can only be there for them, to listen, to offer guidance, and to love them. But then, love is the greatest glue of all.

Originally posted at Fiddledeedee.

7 Responses to The Glue That Binds
  1. Carrie of Ceaseless Praises
    September 14, 2008 | 2:59 pm

    Oh, wow- how sad! Right now the saddest thing I’ve had to go through with my 9-month-old is his getting blood drawn or falling and bumping his head, but I know there will be many more hurts down the road! 🙁 I’m proud of you for handling it with grace- I don’t know if I’ll have it in me! 🙂

  2. Angela
    September 14, 2008 | 4:01 pm

    I’m dreading this day for my daughters, ages 4 & 5. I remember all too well the hurts of my awkward childhood. OTOH, I think I will be better equipped to deal with my daughters’ hurts than my son’s, because I can relate to them.

  3. Megan
    September 14, 2008 | 5:39 pm

    I know, it breaks your heart, doesn’t it? I am all-the-time trying to keep my 4-yr-old from becoming attached to the Big Kids in our neighborhood (whom for some reason she has a particular affinity) who will gladly play with her when she’s the only one around, but shun her when children their own ages are available to play, because she’s “just a baby.” I understand why they do it, but THAT’S MY LITTLE GIRL YOU’RE MAKING SAD THERE, KID! and it’s awfully hard not to get furious and yell at ’em.

  4. Megan
    September 14, 2008 | 5:40 pm

    That was me, Megan, of FriedOkra. Not that it matters. I’m just identifyin’ myself.

  5. Casey
    September 14, 2008 | 9:16 pm

    How sad. I was teary when I read about your little girl’s heartbreak. I have two boys, and I am not looking forward to those days.

  6. midlife mommy
    September 14, 2008 | 11:26 pm

    Oh geez. I am just dreading this too. My tough little girl has such a tender heart. I hope that she can grow up and still keep some of that.

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    April 2, 2012 | 10:27 am

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